Idle Time

What to do at work when you have nothing to do?

I have to wander around the small size office every two hour asking people for something to do but no one is giving me any tasks or seats relaxing and waiting (make myself at home la pulak). While at work I enjoy the chat around water cooler, and sometime I act going into the toilet and taking nap. I know no one will question me where I have been, if they ask me I got an answer stuck inside my head ~ DIARRHEA? LOL! It is embarrassing to pretend/admit I am battling with diarrhea. :-) Other than "toilet nap" I also enjoy my short nap crawl under the desk(during lunch hour) and I surf guilt free. But it still driving me crazy having nothing to do. I can't stand it and I feel useless. I like to be useful at work. Almost everyday, I find myself thinking "won't someone please give me something to do?". Something about it just feel so boring and tedious. The waiting, watching the clock and hoping. I have to fake busy at work, typing on a black keyboard tricking my boss into loving me for all my hard work.

Honestly, I feel guilty because I'm being paid RM500 practical allowance per month for doing nothing (half of the time) and not delivering anything for it. It is just a feel like I'm taking advantage of something. I am not sure whether my boss is okay with it (if I know he have no problem doing nothing for a while though I will be happy). Sometimes when I came into his office, he asked me "what have you done today?". That question made me scare to see him when I need him to sign my attendance sheet. *sigh

Today November 17 0935 I overanalyzing my personality. The result showed that being forced to stay at work for 8 hours when sometimes I don't have 8 hours of work to do causes boredom. Hahaha personally, I prefer boredom over stress. And if I'm too bored, might become depressed and get confused about my life purpose. *laugh . 13 more days in Bintulu 9 more days until I'm finish my internship.

ps: Am I the only one I know in person experience this?

xoxo:bella

Monday

Don't spend all your time wondering what you are or who you like or whether is right for you or wrong for you. Just let yourself be happy

-callie torres-

Getting There

I am so SCARED!!

Staring at my phone waiting for someone to text or call me, YM is open on my computer with a row of empty contact, and with FB chat no one has sent me a message and still waiting for my colleague to give me something to do at office. OMG I am so bored.

Few minutes later, I am smiling on my laptop screen as I writing this :-) and take the risk yet most people don't where someone might come into the room and think I am a complete lunatic. Staring at my calendar on the right hand side of my light grey table and marking down the dates suddenly draw my attention to 11.11.11. So finally I got a pretty good excuse for not being around in Kuching for a while. That mean in exactly twenty six days I will be in Muddy Kuala (Kay-L). This time my major attraction to come down to KL not because of school/work, it's all about M-YES2011 will soon be here (oh yes retail therapy and Lord, please protect me from my desire to shop till drop) & about night life, clubbing & E! (entertainment) because Heineken Thirst presents Tiesto in Malaysia event is in just TWENTY NINE days.

29 days!

" A day that have been long awaited by Malaysian clubber's is finally here" - clubbing9ine.com

-google image-

I know there are many Tiesto fans out there. Tiesto, one of the world most famous trance DJs & producer will be performing live in Muddy Kuala on the 10th of December at Welcome Centre, Sepang International Circuit. So this one is for you guys. Have you got your tickets?

Please click for larger image

I can't imagine myself will be there OMG! Luckily I will be there with awesome friends and we're in together. Yes things are little crazy this week where ADR keep counting the days everyday and post the countdown on my FB wall and it's so nice to have some friends in common. Thank you very much. F! I am extremely excited and I can't wait for Tiesto where I can hanging out with awesome friends in the right place at the right time can make a history of my life.

I stole this picture straight from RR fb. I love it! I got mine already :-)

ADR & I made a promise to keep it "hush-hush" and keep it save. Let's see if we can keep it that way. The hardest thing to do in this world to keep the things on the "hush-hush" until the day actually come out. Sigh! Unfortunately few days/weeks after we bought our tickets, surprise surprise the rumour spread extremely fast and lots of my friends rang me and asked me "that" question. I may have no choice and have to tell them the truth. lol! It's no longer our secret.

List of peoples who know I'm going to TIESTO:

1. Angelica & Randy (ADR friends &b RR siblings)

2. Baby sister Joanna
3. My friends in KL, Yohannes, Delma, Andy, Azura & Heen, Ray
4. My colleague Radzak, Sha, Darence, Kivent, Gui & Harrison
5. My friends in Kuching Jenifer & Reuben , Vanessa & Desmond, Daryl, Alex Soh, Amy Lola, Peewee, Amy Chua, Anthony
6. I guess 841 Facebook friends and 93 twitter followers who manage to see tiesto-related posts/timeline and my blog readers.

7. ?????? I guess the list of people who know I'm going to Tiesto keep on growing, growing and growing.

Last but not least, I am so thrilled that my dream halfway come true. Spreading happy vibes to all.

ps:funfunfun

xoxo:bella

Words

No matter how much I write my heart out, sometimes WORDS just can't describe how I feel. I just have to feel it for myself & that's all there is to it. What had happen was, I can't tell if it's killing me or it's making me stronger. Sometimes I just feel like $&*$#! I can't stay mad at someone(s) for a long time. What's the point holding on to what hurts? Maybe this weekend is the perfect time for me to make room for what feels good. I'm mentally & physically knackered. I need my own space. Me time. Just me & me. Without my family & friends. Good books, chocolate and coffee are welcome to be my friends, my companion. They make me laugh and cry in a special way.

ps:my happiness project

xoxo:bella

Who Say Money Can Buy Anything?

Hey guys, how's it going? I've been crzzy with work. I have been here in Bintulu, and haven't seen my family since then (Hari Raya). I think I'm crazzy desperate for my family. I figured out maybe I should take a days off to see my family in Kuching. Maybe it's not the person I miss, it is the feeling moments I had with them. I never realized how fast time fly when I am with my family, everyday just went faster & faster something like that lah.

At Kota Kinabalu with my baby sisters & cous. I stole this pictures from my cous fb.

Abnormal thing is when I'm here in Bintulu or KL I am always a. working b. studying c. doing some sort of social activities. In Kuching, I was hanging out with the manufacturers of me(my parents), my obnoxious sisters & my friends, everyday/every-night is a great time to watch television (including weekend), going to the church, going to the shopping mall, going to "kafeidian" and lots of family activities. I miss being pampered and protected by my parents. Father and mother making me breakfast, lunch and dinner, parents doing my laundry, father asking me scary questions, I doesn't have to do any house chores and my mother is fine with it because she has another two daughters to help her( I occasionally do house chores around the house when I live with my family) . All those little things really make big difference, I feel like 10 years younger hahaha.

Quality Time with family (without me) I stole this picture from Aunt Achil FB

Next, despite we make lots of money by the sweat of one's brow, we can't buy happiness, neither love and such things. I believe that money is only medium in order to get something, here's an examples, I'm homesick! I have money so why not I buy the flight ticket, fly to Kuching and meet my family? or if I don't have time to go back, why don't I reload my cell phone and give my family a call right? What's next? When I got my first salary I want to share it with my family. Whatever it is, family time spent together will always be the best and the most treasure. Quality time with family is some things money just can't buy. When I thought about it yeah yeah yeah, it is so important to value the time we have together.

x-mas 2009

ps: daughter/sister missing her family

xoxo:bella